Dark Days
O Holy Nights!

My favorite Christmas song is “O Holy Night.” The one line gets me every time, “Fall on your knees, Oh hear the Angels’ voices.” Falling on your knees before God is not a comfortable posture. It isn’t attractive. It is awkward. We don’t see if often in our Americanized religious gatherings. And it displays to anyone watching: humility and desperation. In 2009-2010, I battled a strong bout of depression. My morning quiet time became unproductive because I didn’t know what to pray. The words just weren’t there. So I tried praying on my knees. At first, it was weird; but eventually, I found it the most comforting moment in my day. Sometimes, the sunrise would beam through the shutters in such a way that I could feel the beams on my back, as I was praying on my knees. Maybe God was using them to hug me! On some days, depression can render you horizontal in bed, as if there’s concrete blocks around your ankles. But I discovered that if I’d start the day praying on my knees, I was half way to standing up on the floor. This Christmas, if it’s hard to sing “Fa La La La La, La La La La” take a line from “O Holy Night” and try this. It may be a Christmas gift [from God] you weren’t expecting—turning a dismayed morning into a holy night! ❤️

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